This Christmas Morning...

I spent it reminiscing memories of snowy white

of amazing views I have previously only seen in postcards and photos

recalling the feel of chilly wind against my cheeks

the blinding sunlight reflected on snow

the feeling of inner peace while gazing down at the world
from 10000 feet height

the elated child in me jumping in joy inside my heart while playing with snow
despite being chilled to having blue lips

Next time
I shall build a cuter snowman than this!
(haha...this is not ours)

Everyone, have a merry Christmas
and a happy new year!! ^^

Taken in Sept 2011 at Mt Titlis, Switzerland

Graduated =D

17 December 2011

It was a bright morning.


Despite the big sun,
the sweaty foreheads,
the huge crowd of graduates and parents roaming the entire college ground
posing and scouting friends for pictures,


I couldn't help but feel elated.

YES we've finally graduated!!

Have always wanted to throw it like that.


Now that I've done that, next on my list would be to burn those notes that tortured me for years. Ah the satisfaction of just thinking bout it....

But I'm too environmental friendly and would probably ended up recycling them to the old newspaper man lol.

领悟

从以前就一直觉得自己的心理比同龄的朋友早熟，所以感觉上这几年在心境的方面都没有怎样变化和成长。但如果真要说一个不同之处的话，就是我更能体会：
放开，不强求。

要来的，挡也挡不住
要走的，挽也挽不回

（当然前提是在曾经努力过之后。要是都没尝试过就放弃，也太对不住自己了）

所以还是那句： 世事无常，珍惜此刻所拥有的。

人是善忘的

Humans are forgetful.

Just reached home on Wednesday night. Went to visit grandma straight from airport. People who change the most within a short time span are children and the elderly. Before I left for UK, she was suddenly looking a lot better. Now she has returned to looking thin and sullen.

But I thank God that all of my family members are okay while I’m gone.

It is kinda weird how things will just fall back into place when I reach home. Aside from the slight foreign feeling I had when I took my first step into the house, everything else just felt the same afterwards. I do the same things at the same spot, in the same sequence as I always had. I know 4 months aren’t that long a time to be away from home. Yet, it almost felt like I never left home.

If not for the fact that I am still jet-lagged and with tons of photos to arrange, I might forget that I’ve actually gone through those days:
stressful weekly presentations, weekend day trips, cooking and laundry, assignments, staring at the sky from my big window, preparing for finals, missing home, packing for trips (hate packing, but am now a pro in stuffing things into my luggage *wink*), be actually on trip in Europe and Scotland, relaxingly strolling in London, and looking forward to going home.

It was a busy but well-spent four months. Many first-time experiences and a lot of memories created.

But now, I’m home. =)

Got tons of photos to go through… will upload them soon before the memories fade. This way, I can look back and recall with better clarity in future.

Kimyen, thank you for accompanying me for an entire month throughout our trips.
Couldn’t ask for a better roommate than your best friend for almost 10 years. =)

熊猫一只

累的时候，告诉自己，
没关系
加油！!

因为...

能者一向都多劳的！

哈哈哈


而且
当老师从批评到称赞的那一刻

心底所感到的自豪
并不是每个人都能感受到的


尽力做到最好
只为过自己的那关 =)

终于可以好好睡觉了...

Elo

long time no update my blog

too busy doing assignments / presentations / study for test

and laze around when i'm not

so hello =)

Ever since I'm here

I've stayed awake until sunrise quite a few times already


sky turns light when it's about 4am+


dawn




waffles and horlick for breakfast ^^



Love my window view in the morning and late at night

afternoon too hot lol. direct sunlight.





tak sangka already 2 months!!

next month finals and my semester will be over omg.

still

alot has to be done...

just thinking bout it makes me feel lazy hahaha

ps: the way he catches the guitar is like it's so light and easy. haha.

Seriously, I gave up on life.

stressed

Im soooo frustrated with myself beyond any point of resentment

I can't be a teacher

'Cause i can't stand it when people doesn't respond to me.

I mean, if you can't understand something or didn't hear it clearly the first time (trust me I do that all the time), you can always ask the person to repeat it.
Don't stand there like you didn't hear anything and let the other party wait.
Don't stutter like a broken record trying to get your point through. (and still fail in that attempt)

I'm sorry I get impatient when I'm stressed, but I don't sympathize when I sense that you're not meaning well.
If you don't like something, speak up and suggest a better idea or alternative.
We should always focus on problems at hand, not on the people.
Don't go ambiguous on me by saying "I dunno" when I ask for your opinion, and then secretly dislike me for doing something.
And not once or twice, but quite a few times d.

Contrary to what you may think, i can sense your dissatisfaction when you talk. So why is it so difficult to come up straight and tell me what you think, instead of bottling in every time I ask, then later be grumpy about it and dump your negativity on me?
At least I try. Can't say the same for you.

Gosh I seriously prefer straightforwardness and and honesty over ambiguity in relationships.

(this makes me more empathetic towards those guys who have no idea what some girls are thinking hahahaha. well only in certain cases lah. Some of the guys are just plain insensitive xD)

I don’t get angry often. It takes a lot to get me more than mildly annoyed. ‘Cause I don’t get angry with strangers/acquaintances/people who are unimportant to me.
They’re not important enough to spoil my mood. I usually just stay away. Maintain my distance. But there are some instances where I can't maintain distance and have to deal with some people I don't really like on a regular basis.
So.

Let's focus on positive.
Luckily you're not my groupmate.
Luckily you're not my roommate.

Lalalala.... we should forget what is unimportant.
I should stock up on more cookies. Running out fast. lol.

and something is wrong with my mouse's left click.,..

Oxford

Went to Oxford yesterday. It was raining, so didn’t take many pictures. Mood already dampened by the rain. I think it’s not as nice as Cambridge city.
But from the pictures uploaded by other friends, it seems that there are some corners of the city which shows its true history.

Actually I’m more interested in the Bodleian Library and Christ Church, which were the film locations for the Hogwarts library and Great Hall in Harry Potter movies.
Haha HP fan here. But ah, the entrance tickets are expensive. What a turn-off. =.=

Anyway heard that the queue was damn long. So even if you are willing to pay, u may not be able to get in either. Luckily for us, we have internet. can view anytime at the comfort of our own room and can take our own sweet time. xD

Bodleian Library

(by J.Samoral in Flikr)

featured as Library in Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry

(http://www.historic-uk.com/DestinationsUK/HarryPotter.html)

Christ Church - Great Hall


(the above 3 pictures, see also know that they are taken by professionals la.
So credits to them, not me)

So instead of trying to find our ways to those tourist attractions in Oxford, ky and I decided to just hang out. Stroll casually along the streets. Go into whatever shops that catch our attention. Visit a museum or two.

Curi the map from Simon and took off. Haha…sorry Simon. I’m sure you won’t miss us anyway. Maybe your map. =P

Tours organized by Hallam Union has poor services. No student rep. Not all students are provided maps. No advice on where to go what to play. Tsk tsk. It charges the same ticket price with tour agencies but lousy customer service.

But it’s good to get out and breathe some fresh air, change of mind and scenery after every hectic week of assignments.

Saw this bookshop that sells all of its books at 2pounds each!! All of its books are expensive kinds. I’d say within the range of RM36-RM150++.
Political, Science, Art, Travel, Fiction, Business, Religion, Health etc.
Stayed so long in there, trying to get a book I’d want enough to buy it, or there’s someone I can give it to. Didn’t wanna buy just because it’s worth it, ‘cause I feel like that’s insulting a book’s existence lol. But in the end couldn’t find, felt so sad...
Ky and I managed to grab a book each, after almost an hour in there I think. xD

Day trips like these are fun actually. Only drawback is the bus ride. 6-8 hours to and return journey. Tiring.

As if to make up for the rainy day, we saw this spectacular view as reached home and headed for dinner in city centre.

Rainbow!

Not only 1....

But a double rainbow!
My camera can’t capture clearly the second rainbow.
but it can be seen very clearly, in reverse colors.

the rainbow is so wide that it cannot fit into my lens.
Needa take two shots for complete bow lol.

After awhile, the rainbow became a stacker rainbow. The one that.. erm, below the normal rainbow is immediately attached with a range of colors, but fainter and narrower.
wiki if u're interested to know =)

And after some time, all 7 rainbow colors became more vivid. Macam highlighted by Stabilo highlighter. When the stacker (supernumerary) rainbow appeared, I stopped taking pics and just enjoy it haha. It lasted so long. Never seen this before.

ok la i insert one pic i curi from a fb fren xD

credits to Henry Yee

Had a very nice dinner at Hong Kong Wok. Ironic.
At Malaysia, we go eat Western. At UK, we go eat Oriental food.
Maybe food taste better when they’re more expensive. Lol.

Winter Break '11

 

 

I am afraid that I wish for the wrong thing to happen . I, once said that I hoped for a good friend in a foreign land here.
Now to think about it, having a close friend does not necessarily ameliorate the situation, instead it can backfire.

Semester 2 - Be gentle on me

It has been such a long time since I've last blogged.
Today is my last day of my 3-week long winter break, and I hardly can recall what I've done during my first week of break. 
Last semester...was by far, the most stressful period time of my life. And every time whenever I am enrolled into a new semester, it just have to break a new record in my depression meter. I wonder how worst can these be progressively worse.
This year I relentlessly disappoint myself, my brain is just not cooperating with me. I did some studies during this break, but seems like it not quite enough.
Anyway, I am praying hard that I will pass my resit this coming September. I don't wish to repeat my year.
Honestly, I am very afraid of losing my old self which seems to be clear of my goals and my study methods of previous years seem to be working in the way that I wanted. But this year...it came as a shock to me. Maybe its the change of environment. I need operant conditioning,perhaps.
So, I really really really hope my memory will return to its normal capacity (or even better) and will be more focused for this coming semester. I can't afford to fcuk up anymore...

星期一 晴

转眼间，我已离家3个星期了。这将是我第一次离家3-4个月这么久。

my room - first window from left

每次与爸妈skype完，都有一种想哭的念头。 不懂是不是那一句：
“怎样？过得还好吗？”

我自己可以很坚强地去陌生的地方，去走我没走过的路，
完成我一开始不懂怎样做的assignments, 面对各种不同类型的人…

但是，就是你的那句，令我第一次有想要流泪的念头。哈哈…都不懂做么。
明明平时在家的时候，差不多半天以上的时间都窝在房间里的。你们也常不在家。加起来一天最多就只有2-3小时吃饭和聊天的时间罢了。

我想，我习惯的，是感受到你们的存在。
就算你们不在家，我知道，你们是会回来的。
就算我在房间，我知道，只要我下楼，你们就会在那。

我可以，在任何时候，和你说些无聊的话。
例如…申诉下我的assignment有多么的难做，很想死啊…
炫耀一下今天那个公认很难伺候的教授竟然肯开金口说我们
“Well done! Good job!”啊…
皱着眉头问为什么我现在吃着的kiwi酱鬼死酸啊…
还有一些委屈的事等等

这些，都是skype那十几分钟里面被省略掉的。
取而代之的，是不知道要讲什么又有所保留的尴尬。
话题绕来绕去都是重复着课业，钱，时间这些外在的问题。
不敢讲太多，怕有情绪的波动。所以只好被动地，回答着你们的问题，再说几句无关紧要的话题。

我看，这些对于那些常年在外的学子早已习以为常了吧。
比起那些还要边工作边读书的，一读就4-5年的，我这算小儿科啦。

但是，令我感动的是
从几句话或动作，就能感受到你们对我的关怀和爱。


我过得好好，不用担心。=)

（但是你们又看不到我的Blog, 也看不到我的facebook, 所以...就酱啦。哈哈）

I never thought I’d say this but

Summer in UK is hot!!

Before I came, I was thinking ah, my long sleeve shirts can tahan cold anot… where’s the best place to buy windbreaker… whether to bring scarf and fingerless gloves…

And those considerations prove to be valid for the past 2 weeks.
Yup I’ve arrived in Sheffield for 2 weeks now.
Weather is cooling on average days, chilly with wind. But today…. =.=
Please gimme back the weather under 18°C, and cool wind if u must have sun. 28°C with no aircond or even fan feel stuffy inside the room. Air is STILL despite window is open.
(window can only be open inwards maximum for about 15°) Needa get a fan soon…

Am still exhausted from party on Fri night (kinda lousy) and trip to Cambridge on Saturday. Love the cool wind and the old architecture there. There are many cobble streets and bicycles and ancient colleges and churches…
Cambridge students’ accommodations are those buildings that look centuries old…but I think inside have been renovated. If I were to live in that city, I’d feel all scholarly and smart too lol. Just that I’d be annoyed with too many tourists xD

looking very tired after only 3 hours of sleep

Met Simon during the lunch break =)

finally reached after 3 and half hours of bus ride

cute

huge park
perfect place to spend a pleasant day out with loved ones

us lol

must snap pics in time before walking by thru the streets!

local market area
with delicious hotdogs

lotsa bicycles. the students are already pro in speeding while avoiding pedestrians.

Kate and William souvenirs still available everywhere

a corner in the souvenir shop

i like the letterbox, the doubledecker, and the phone booth...
but didnt wanna buy cuz think it's overpriced.
could get it in London later anyway

King's College (if not mistaken)

that double decker was booked for the day as a wedding ride haha, so yeng
to tumpang all the wedding guests from church
wedding bells can be heard from far

a miniature version of a castle

didn't manage to fully capture the entire castle though.
was too near

a corner of a college, which we're not supposed to be allowed into

Most of the churches and colleges either does not allow visitors, or require an expensive ticket per entrance. So we decided to take the punting ride to visit 7 colleges along the river Cam, and also the infamous Bridge of Sigh and the Mathematical Bridge.

Punting is a boat ride rowed by someone using a long stick.
Ok that’s not a very good description but ah, you get the picture.

The guy (this one below) rowing my boat wasn’t very careful, kept on splashing water on my back >.<

but Simon group’s boat was rowed by a hot guy lol. I think he heard my friends squealing from above bout how handsome he is, then he immediately rolled up his sleeves and looked up at us lol.

and this scene was captured by my friend.

Lol. He must have understood what lengzhai means and immediately responded.

ducks that avoid the punts

"that's Charles Darwin's house!" said the punter

That's Mathematical Bridge. Wiki for more info. I did, but lazy write here lol.

Bridge of Sigh. Named after the one in Venice.

Rumored to have got its name from the sighs of those pre-exam students who passed by this bridge on their way to exam.

Not many pictures taken 'cause my camera battery died halfway during the punting ride =.="
Been taking pics using ky's camera since. lol. ky faster upload!
Other pics are taken and tagged by friends in facebook, so can be viewed there.

Sleepy.
Tomorrow group discussion at 11am. Suppose to lead the discussion. But haven't really read new case study. Dai wok.
but never mind, sleep first then wake up earlier. haha.

(Don't know since when it started, but I seem to get more and more relaxed when it comes to deadlines... can't say it's due to over confidence. Maybe 'cause i'm already immuned.)

Anyway, good night! =)